Alien Hangover: Man Claims E.T.s Are Drugging Him In His Sleep
" SNOOZE YOU LOSE, AND GALACTICIZE YOUR SNORE?** Meet 'Z', our somnambulant spaceman who swears blind he's waking up each day buzzed off his tits - but not by anything terrestrial.…
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Aliens Sue Earth for Breach of Galactic Social Distancing Orders
In a cosmic courtroom showdown, Earth finds itself in deep space doo-doo after aliens from Planet Zork filed a lawsuit alleging we've broken galactic social distancing rules. The extraterrestrial…
Pizza Delivery Guy Becomes Time Lord After Consuming Experimental Cheese
HEADS UP: LOCAL PIZZA SLICE TURNS DELIVERY DRIVER INTO TIME-TRAVELING SAVIOR Dough Town residents…
NASA Scientist Accidentally Discovers Chocolate Originated from Alien Cocoa Beans
by Ruthless Red-Pen Harrington, Sweetwater Gazette SWEETWATER, AL - Hold onto your marshmallows, folks. NASA scientist Dr. Albert "Crunch" Wrigley has unearthed something out of this world: …